Nobody wants to coach football at Tennessee? I have a Volunteer in mind!

Another day, another turn-down for the University of Tennessee as they try to fill their vacant football head coaching position.  Today’s spurn was courtesy of the current head coach at North Carolina State University.  Dave “Not-your-household-name” Doeren was the latest to say “No, thanks” to Rocky Top in their search to replace Butch Jones (who was, justifiably, fired as the once-proud Vols posted a school-worst 0-8 SEC record this season).  Doeren wasn’t exactly Mr. Wizard at N.C. State with a pedestrian 33-30 record in his five seasons in the ACC.

He joins Oklahoma State’s Mike Gundy and Duke University football coach (and former Tennessee offensive coordinator) David Cutcliffe in the “Thanks for getting me more money from my current school, UT!” game being played.

It makes you wonder, “Why WOULDN’T someone want to coach football at Tennessee?”  Sure, the orange and white checkerboard end zones are a bit garish.  And, yes, that bright orange Tennessee uniform color may be the toughest on the eyes in college football.  Maybe the Tennessee Volunteers marching band, which has a great tradition and solid sound, could learn a few more tunes other than “Rocky Top”, too.

Maybe it’s the money?  Former head football coach, Butch Jones, received an estimated $4 million per year (not bad!), and he’ll even grab another $6 to 9 million after he was sent home this season.  I’ll take that, wouldn’t you?

It seems to me that there is just one name that is conspicuously missing from the University of Tennessee head football coaching list.  He is a football legend in Tennessee and the most popular athletics figure to ever wear the orange.  None other than…

Peyton Manning!  This job is set-up perfectly for the retired two-time Super Bowl winning quarterback.  He has played coy with the “No, I’m flattered, but not now” banter, but things have turned a bit embarrassing for Volunteer Nation with all of these relative no-names turning their noses up at the job in Knoxville.  It’s time to put down the Papa John’s Pizza, Peyton, and save your Alma Mater!

Who better than Peyton Manning, who set numerous school and SEC passing records while at Tennessee in the 1990’s, to rescue the Vols from the brink and lead them back to SEC relevance?  Seriously, what recruit and his family wouldn’t want to have a home visit from an NFL Hall-of-Fame quarterback?

Need some assistant coaches?  Here are a few thoughts for the new Peyton Manning era at Tennessee:

Offensive Coordinator – Eli Manning.  The New York Giants have placed their own two-time Super Bowl winner on the bench.  He should retire and have fun coaching college ball with his big brother, don’t you think?  Every college offensive player would benefit from a daily tutelage from the Manning brothers.

Defensive Coordinator – John Chavis.  Chavis was a UT defensive coaching standout for Philip Fulmer while a young quarterback named Peyton Manning led the Vols offense.  After Fulmer was sacked, Chavis took his stellar defenses to LSU (Les Miles) and Texas A&M (Kevin Sumlin).  Since Sumlin was just fired last Sunday by A&M, Chavis would be a popular hire back in Knoxville and would be a trusted hand for rookie coach, Peyton Manning.

Special Teams – Anyone named Colquitt.  Four different punters named Colquitt (Craig, Jimmy, Dustin, and Britton) have kicked for the Volunteers over the years, and the Colquitt kids then combined for a total of 18 years playing in the NFL.

It’s time.  It would be exceedingly fun.  And everyone in the SEC and around the country would take notice that a sleeping orange giant had been awakened again at Tennessee!